Shattered (open)

[Ω-Admin-Cara-Ω]

Cara stood outside White Oak. She clenched her fists to stop herself from shaking, but knew she was failing miserably as she could still feel herself shaking like a leaf. She was wearing a light blue polo shirt, brown riding tights and her paddock boots, her obsidian coloured hair was pulled back into the normal neat bun, hair pins keeping any stray bits off her face.

A night had passed since the meeting in the principal's office with Mr Rees and Mr Andrews. A whole day since she had ventured anywhere near the barns. she guessed she was just lucky that she had handed her mare and foals over to the academy as a loan so that they were well cared for when she wasn't around... but then, when wasn't she around?

Standing at the door, she knew that she was drawing more attention than she would like, so she knew that she would need to enter the building to detract the unwanted attention. She drew in a deep breath, her tiny shoulder raising as she drew it in, and they dropped as she released the breath and crossed the threshold.

Her steps were silent and deliberate as she moved down the aisle. They began to slow down as she neared the end of the barn, to the stall that housed the Avangelise mare. It wasn't like the girl was expecting the mare to be hanging over her door and trumpeting a greeting to her young owner, but she didn't need to be able to see inside the stall to know it was empty.

The young student stood at the stall door. The loose box was empty and had already been cleaned out. If one didn't look close enough and see the few bits of evidence around the stall, you wouldn't think that this stall had been occupied less than 24 hours ago.

Opening the door, the young half-breed walked onto the cleared floor and turned in a complete circle. She suddenly felt lost, empty, hollow. No matter what, she'd always had an equine to turn to. Now? She had nothing. she sat heavily on the ground, her legs no longer seeming to want to hold her up as the girl's world seemed to crash around her.

[Sync]

The clang of a loose shoe clattered against the cobbled ground, which made the large Clydesdale's owner flinch. He mentally made a note to book an appointment with the academy farrier. This disappointed him slightly, he had been hoping to take Dave out on the trails later this day. Now he would have to ride Queenie, which he didn't really mind but Dave was just such a pleasure to ride. He was bringing the abnormally large brute, who was even taller than his average breed height, from the pastures as he had noticed the lame movements of the bay. Dave nickered as he passed other equines on his way to his stall. Then, the clip of nails against the ground sounded behind them, announcing the arrival of both Marble and Macaulay. The Saluki and Deer hound aligned themselves beside Trevor, their lengthy whipcords swaying through the thin air. The weather was changing quickly, the air was growing colder and the colors of the landscape were changing dramatically. Trevor sighed blissfully, this was a wonderful time of year.

They finally reached the stall which Dave resided in. Trevor paused to run his finger of the name plaque which held Dave's show name. Ole' Faithful. The name suited him perfectly, the gelding at fifteen years of age had been with Trevor since he was a colt. The pair had a strong bond, and they had taught each other valuable lessons. Trevor lead the patient equine into the stall, reminiscing about their first few years together. His hands unbuckled the head collar and let it fall from the broad cranium of the horse. Dave shook his dome violently, his thick banner whipping around his neck and dome. Trevor smiled easily, and then went around to his side. Right, let me just check your hoof and then I'll get you some lunch. he commented in his thick Scottish brogue. Dave blew a gust of warm air onto Trevor's back, and then picked up his hoof easily. The heavy limb made his master's arm drop a few inches and adjust his stance to accommodate the weight of the leg. His fingers traced the metal shoe, and then he pulled it gently. It wasn't too loose to hurt the horse, but it could be thrown at any moment. He sighed, and the let the horse drop his hoof back against the ground. I'll be back in a bit then. he told Dave, straightening up just after he picked up the bucket.

He tapped his outer thigh to signal to the canines to come to his side, and then set off down the aisle toward the feed room. He paused when he noted the open stall door. Marble kept on going, but Macaulay seemed to sense the distress of someone. Trevor peered into the stall and saw a girl slumped against the ground. Concern marred his normally confident features and Macaulay gave a whine. She stepped toward the young female and pressed her muzzle into her face. Are you okay Sweetheart? he asked. His words were soft, he tried to use the least threatening choice possible. He had no idea how it would go down with her. He dropped down so that he was in a crouched position, but didn't approach her. He didn't want her to feel cornered. He left enough of a gap in the door way to allow her to flee if need be. Macaulay dropped down onto her stomach beside the girl, looking up at her with a mask of concern that could only really be associated with the canine features. Her dark gray cranium kept pressing gently into the girls knee, as if to comfort.

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word count: six hundred and thirteen
tags: Cara
listening to: Glee!
mood: Happy
lyrics: i'm not a thief, i'm a treasure hunter by a skylit drive
made by: callie!
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[Ω-Admin-Cara-Ω]

Cara sat on the floor of the clean, empty stall. She quickly gathered her thoughts before she allowed her already fragile psyche to completely disintegrate. Se needed to get a grip on herself, she needed to remember what the past had taught her. She couldn't now turn into one of the many girls she had met in foster homes who had been broken by their... masters was the only word she could think of to describe the men who turned those girls into empty shells. Her fingers rubbed her temples, trying to banish the headache that was threatening to crush her, as she thought over the ponies she had ridden in the past and then left behind. Phoenix was no different to any of them. Or at least she tried to make herself believe that.

She jumped back as the face of a canine suddenly came into focus and she clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle the scream that threatened to explode. Closing her eyes, she counted to ten and waited for her heart to return to it's normal beat - that which was a little more rapid than most people's, but normal for her - and opened her eyes again to look at the canine who was still watching her.

Are you okay Sweetheart?

At the sound of a male's voice, she was unable to stop the terrified whimper that left her lips as she spun her torso around to look at the owner of the voice, her eyes wide as her stomach tightened and she took in the man's posture and tone. No Was her first thought, but she stopped the word from passing her lips as she pressed them together. "I will be, thank you Sir." She finally replied in her whisper-soft voice. And it was true, she would be okay once she managed to pull herself together and put her training into place.

She looked at the canine again and offered the animal her hand before running over her soft coat. All fear for the animal had vanished, she had just been started to find herself face to face with the creature. She focused on her breathing, trying to slow it down and get the tightness in her stomach to release, the last thing she wanted to do right now was throw up and that's normally what this feeling led to.

[Sync]

He wasn't convinced, but didn't push her. Macaulay, who seemed pleased to just gain eye contact from the girl, scrambled closer toward her. Trevor looked at the Deer hound, baffled by her behavior. She didn't usually act like this, but Trevor wasn't exactly angry with the change. At least one of his dogs had a heart. Marble trotted back to his master's side, peering into the stall with distaste, and then turned on his heels and stalked back up toward Dave's stall. Well, if your sure your okay.. I guess I could introduce myself? he started, creasing his forehead at his choice of words. He settled with the excuse that it was still early, ish, and not the time to form intellectual sentences. I'm Mr.Evans, or Trevor when I am off duty, The new vice principal and psychology teacher. he smiled, not bothering to offer out his hand as he was pretty sure she wouldn't shake it. Whom may you be? he asked with interest.

Another thing suddenly struck him. Why was she sat in an empty stall, looking as if she was about to start bawling her eyes out? Why hadn't he picked up on this earlier? He really wasn't on the ball today, but the stress of travelling from Britain, and the fact that if he was back in Scotland right now, he would be sleeping, was obviously starting to effect him. Yetm he didn't press it, he just stood up and smiled at the girl. I guess if you are fine, I'll go and feed my horse. He turned on his heel, and clicked for Macaulay to come to his side. When she didn't move, he rolled his eyes. Send her my way when you have had enough of her.. I'll be just up there if you need me. he told the girl, pointing at the stall with the large Clydesdale's cranium hanging over the door. He picked up the bucket and quickly went to the feed room.

His hand fiddled with the lock on Dave's stall, and then he let himself in. The bucket was placed on the ground and the gelding drove his head into it. Trevor, now able to relax a little, yawned. He knew he shouldn;t give into the calls of jet lag, he needed his body clock to sort itself out ASAP. He decided that grooming Dave should keep his mind off of things. He began to search for the curry comb in the grooming box, it seemed to be hiding.

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word count: four hundred and twenty one
tags: Cara
listening to: Camp Rock 2
mood: Tired
lyrics: i'm not a thief, i'm a treasure hunter by a skylit drive
made by: callie!
_____________________________________

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[Ω-Admin-Cara-Ω]

She groaned inwardly when the man introduced himself as not only the vice-principal but also the psychology teacher, the last thing she needed was for someone to try and get inside her head. "It is an honor to meet you, Mr Evans." She said. "I am called Cara-Jean Kitchi." Her fingers played with the hair on top of the canine's head.

She spun around at his next words, her eyebrows arched as he dismissed himself and walked off. She looked back at the canine who had refused to move. "Should I now be worried?" She asked softly. For a psychology teacher, she didn't expect him to walk away so quickly. She shrugged, actually pleased that he had walked away rather than drilling her with questions.

The fist tightened around her stomach again and she folded herself over to try and get rid of it, the way she used to when she got butterflies before a competition. Rather than going away though, the feeling just got worse. "Sorry, pup." She said to Macaulay as she jumped to her feet, ran out of the stall and through to the girl's changing room - which could be found through a door in the tack room - where she emptied her stomach.

After washing her mouth out over and over again in the sink, she slowly left the changing room. Her feet seemed to be moving in slow motion as she headed back to the empty stall, knowing that she needed to removed the things in the stall that had been left behind. Inside the stall however, she leaned against the wall and slid to the ground. "This would be why I'm not bulimic." She whispered. She hated throwing up, it took too much energy out of the body. Too much more than she had to offer.