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Post by tia on Oct 9, 2009 16:13:27 GMT -6
Hey guys. Well I has an issue that I would like to get solved. See I have been dating my boyfriend, Ethan, for a year and seven months. He lives 75 miles away from my house, I see him only once a month, sometimes not even that, and I only talk to him once a week on the phone. See, my family dosen't like him as much as they use to only because they don't like the decisions he has made. But the decisions that they don't like that he has made are the decisions that we have made as a couple. I don't find it fair that they put it all on him and none on me. I mean it was the both of us, not just him. We were going through a really hard time this week, trying to figure out if we can get through this. Today we finally came to a conclusion and decided to stay together and ride this out strong. He has saved my life but I hate it that my family dosen't like him. I don't plan on leaving him any time soon but it is very frustrating having this burden on my shoulders. Advice anyone?
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Post by Ω-Admin-Cara-Ω on Oct 9, 2009 20:20:56 GMT -6
My advice would be to sit down and tell this to your family. Let them know how miserable it is making you feel and that you and Ethan will be together no matter what, so they may as well just get over it... Okay, maybe not the last part, but have a family conference and get your voice heard.
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Post by .Rissa. on Oct 11, 2009 9:46:13 GMT -6
I'm glad you are deciding to stick it out, though, if it were in me and my boyfriend's shoes, (we have been dating over 2 years) I don't think I would be able to stand it! Parents are just concerned. You know they want the best for you, and a lot of times, they don't realize that what you have, IS the best.
Talking to them is hard, and, it's easy to lose your temper, and everything goes South. How old are you? My first official boyfriend was when I was 15. No one was impressed with him, I ended up dumping him, then found Kirk. My family accepts him, my dad is well, my dad. Me and Kirk are both 19, but my daddy will always see me as his little girl. So, NOTHING will ever be good enough. But, over time, he will realize that happiness is what he has been wanting for me all along, and that I am happy. Or he, may never take a liking to my boyfriend, that's okay. All that matters, is we like each other and we're together.
I would say just blow off what her parents say, or if you can handle it, talk to them, but if not, wave it off.
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Post by tia on Oct 12, 2009 11:29:50 GMT -6
I am 18 years old and have been dating him since I was 16. Its been almost two years. But now Ethan is being a butt. I spent the night at my friend Morgan's house, a guy Morgan, with my twin sister. I was Morgan's Ipod and was talking to Ethan over IM. Before we went to go do barn chorse he asked me if I would do anything to jepordize our relationship. I couldn't answer cause we had to get chorses done. By the time I got back Ethan had logged off. So today he got back on IM when I was home and asked me to answer the question. I told him that I didn't think I would have to cause he should already know the answer. I asked him if he trusts me and then hes like "Well idk because of all the lies you have told me." That got me so mad. I have never held his mistakes against him and he is holding my little lies against me. Some of his mistakes are really big but never have I used them against him or even brought them back up.
Over IM me and him have an awful relationship but when it comes in person its amazing. I don't know what to do.
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Post by .Rissa. on Oct 13, 2009 9:29:03 GMT -6
He might have been jealous over you and Morgan? I know my man wouldn't take that too lightly, but I wouldn't like it much either if I was away, and he stayed with a girl, even if they were just freinds.
I think everyone has a lying problem. I am guilty for lieing to Kirk, he has the right to be mad if I lie to him. Of course they are little lies, like if he asks how I am, and I say 'fine' even if I'm not becuase I don't want to start anything. But Kirk does make some mistakes, nothing huge! Sometimes he honestly doesn't realize how they affect me. I think you two need HONEST communication. Try to cut back on lieing, and help him with his mistakes. Kirk always tells me, that if he is doing something I don't like, tell him. But I end up lieing, and things get worse. Honest communication is key in a relationship.
I would be mad in his case, look, reassurance is good. Yeah, I know Kirk loves me, but I want him to say it. Ethan just wants reassurance from you. You want that from him, right? Try communicating honestly more.
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Post by tia on Oct 13, 2009 10:40:38 GMT -6
wow thanks Rissa. We talked that night after I didn't talk to him for about an hour. I told him that I felt like he was treating me like a stranger and that I never used his mistakes against him like he was going to me and he apologized. First I didn't take his apology cause I was sick of hearing him tell me that he was sorry, but the he told me that he went to his room and sat there and thought about how bad he hurt me.
I am so happy that I can have people to talk to that can help me with my issues in life. Thanks guys!!!
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